My wife and I have been married for 37 years and we have two grown, wonderful children. During the early years of our marriage, I treated her heart roughly. I was not as loving a husband I should have been. She put up with my immature behaviors for a long time. However, I never raised a hand towards her, never called her names, yelled at her, or berated her character. I have always been faithful and committed to her. We have had many wonderful times together. My wife has struggled with depression for many years, and has been on a low dose of anti-depressants, which I have not been in favor of.
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A few years ago, she left me with no notice, no discussion, not a hint that anything was wrong. She convinced our pastor I might harm her if I knew where she was, so he helped her find a safe place to go. I have not, and could never harm my wife. She is the most precious person on earth to me, and it hurt me deeply she might have that fear. My kids, their spouses, and my friends have said they have never felt any kind of fear from me.
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A few weeks after she left, we started communicating again. Over time, it felt like our relationship was improving. One day she sent me an email by mistake, intended for her friend. It contained false, degrading, and hurtful information about me. It was totally different than her recent encouraging words for me. When I called her about the email, she said, "I need help". She wanted to come back home and work things out, and I said yes. We saw a councilor for several months, and worked through some communication issues, but when things felt like they were going well, we made the mistake of stopping.
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For the next few years, it felt like our relationship was on a positive trend. We renewed our marriage vows, exchanged loving cards and gifts, and had some wonderful trips. We were having morning devotionals, praying together, and relationship felt to me to be the best it had ever been
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Six weeks ago, we had spent a wonderful few days with with her family and our kids. She seemed happy and it was fun. After making love the night before, and telling each other we loved one another, she left again with all of her belongings, with no warning, no discussion whatsoever. This time, she left a note saying she thought I could be a stalker, and needed a safe place to go "to heal". She aske me not to contact her. I have never, and would never stalk her. Why would I? She is now in a "safe house" getting some counseling, but won't communicate. No email, phone, nothing. I've been advised NOT to reach out to her in any way. I agree, and want her to take whatever time she needs. This event has shocked and hurt our entire family. None of us saw this coming.
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I love her deeply, but don't know what to do other than pray for her and seek God's insight into my issues, that I'm clearly blind to. I feel like I should have seen this coming, but all of her communication was "I love you".? I've been praying for a marriage that would bring glory to God, but I have failed. I'm devastated and confused. Why won't she talk with me so we can work as partners to grow our marriage?
Source: http://www.focusonlinecommunities.com/thread/22293
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